So I am a get up and go girl. I know this. So being held back by this surgery has really been bumming be out. I feel so unproductive. Sleep, eat a bit, shift from the bed to couch and repeat. Not really what I had in mind for the better part of last week and this one.
As I reflected on it today I realized that everytime I get into a groove of what I call 'super planning' i.e. scheduling vacation, my work, my future job, family. God has a way of stopping me in my tracks and reminding me just how NOT in control I am.
In a way its comforting because I know God's plan is way better for me than the one I am trying to come up with. At the same time it reminds me that I need to stop trying to over plan and ask Him for more guidance and yes, be more PATIENT.
Such a hard thing for me. Just like I can't change the fact that it has rained more days in June than not, I can only work to find the silver lining. Ok, the weather isn't awesome but that means I don't have to water the garden as much. And since the weather is cruddy I don't feel compelled to over do it working outside while I recover.
One of the things about being slowed down from this surgery, it has helped me re-focus. I have been going at maximum speed in my life for the last 2 years with teaching and working on my PhD. I haven't had any me time. Its time to change that.
Things I want to change:
I want to find a new church.
I want to exercise more... even train for a 5k. Yes, sisters are starting to inspire me.
I want to take a pastry/cake decorating class or cooking or something (wouldn't it be fun if I could teach cooking classes someday?)
The other thing about spending time recovering is learning how capable my husband is of taking care of me. Not that I have doubted it. I think we have both realized this week all that it takes to keep the house going and how much of team we actually are. I am feeling a bit better and hope to be up an about really soon. But in the mean time I can cherish the extra hubby/puppy time I am getting.
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