Big Changes...at least they feel big to me

Last week we transitioned Isabel to her crib. Yes, she is 5 months but I wasn't ready even though now I can see she was.

She was sleeping in our room in her Pack n Play and was waking up 2-4x a night and I just new that she was waking herself up wiggling around in her PNP. So after she got over being sick, I decided I had to suck it up and put her in her crib down the hall.

The first night was not as tough as I thought it would be. I gave her a bath, put her PJs on and nursed her in my arms until asleep and rocked for a while. I had her sleep sheep on and the lights off with a night light. She went down at 8pm and slept until 1am. I heard her crying on the monitor and rocked her and put her back down until 3am. Then she was up at 5am where I nursed her and she slept until 7am.

Granted she was up alot that first night but the subsequent nights are getting better with the exception of last night. She did not go down easily, she fought sleep and woke up every 30m for 3h. despite being fed, changed and warm enough. Finally at midnight I admitted defeat and let her sleep next to me for 2h and put her down in her crib until 6am.

I think the transition is going well and she is even starting to nap in her crib so thats huge!

I actually like this new routine and it actually feels familiar from when I was a nanny/babysitter. I crave routine and I think she does too so this is helping both of us. Plus since she is going down easier in this new routine instead of how it used to be in our room, I get 2h to myself before I go to bed and can read etc. in our room like I used to.

On the down side, my PTSD has been fierce at night. Even though this crib thing is going so well, my mind starts racing at night. I have been reliving parts of the trauma lately through more flashbacks and nightmares. I am not entirely sure why its getting worse, I think its because I am physically feeling better. And I am feeling some stress with this transition into her room, thankfully she is no worse for the wear!

In other news, I signed up for WW. The Points Plus program is a combo of old and new WW and I think I like it. I hate counting points but its become alot more scientific and not based primarily on calories but on fat, protein and carbs. I think it will reduce my empty calorie eating and fruits and veggies are free!

I am doing it online and weighing myself 1x a week. I am having J weigh me and record it, I only want to know if I am going up or down and not focusing on the number. I think this will help with accountability.

I signed up for 3 months. I am committing to losing 10% of my body weight and I am not going to diet forever. I think BFing will help and I get more points as a result so I am not starving. Its flexible and easier than say SouthBeach right now. I like SB it works well but not with a baby and eating one handed and shopping quickly at the grocery store.

My mantra? I can do this, I wanna be a fit mama!